April 19th - My first OB appointment

April 19th was my first OB appointment. I was TERRIFIED.  And even more so because everything I had to endure (pap smear and blood work) had no reward because we weren't getting an ultra sound. So, I get to the office and it's really nice - everyone seemed really nice.  I really like the Dr. she is young and has a southern accent and seems really nice.  I was a little less nervous at this point after meeting her, but still did not want the PAP or blood work.  But, I kept telling myself, it's gonna be worth it. After the awful exam (I never liked em, no one does) I decided to ask her if they do ultrasounds on the first visit (I'd either get an explanation and when I'd get one, or maybe she'd say let's go ahead and do one!).  Well, I got lucky.  Because I said I spotted in the 7th week and had pains on my left side she said she wanted to do one that day.  I was so excited.  So, while we waited for the US tech, I went off and got bloodwork (bleh).  When we started the US I was floored.  I couldn't believe there was actually A LIVING THING inside of me.  It's still hard to believe and wrap my head around.  I had asked the tech "Isn't that baby big for 9 weeks?" And she said I was actually measuring 11 weeks! THIS IS EVEN MORE CRAZY.  We heard the heartbeat for a second (170 bpm which she said was perfect) and had she of played it for longer I may of cried! Brandon on the other hand tried not to because he knew i'd make fun of him. Which, i'd only laugh a little ;p 

So, here I sit, 11 weeks pregnant, almost out of my first trimester and anxious as heck to find out the gender!  My OB isn't going to do it until 20 weeks but an ultrasound place here in town does them as early as 15 weeks.  I'm definitely signing up for that! :)

March 13th, 2013

March 13th, my life changed.  It was my first day of my pediatric clinical and as I woke up that morning at 4am, I knew it was time to take the test.  A pregnancy test.  I had suspicions because of my lack of carefulness and I knew that was the day if I were late, pregnancy would be the reason why.  So before I left that morning, I took the test.  Sure enough, pregnant.  2 pink lines.  I almost couldn't believe it.  I didn't believe it.  I was in shock and denial.  I walked out of the bathroom and looked at Brandon and said  -*expletive* my life.- He looked at me like, "Are you serious?!" With the biggest smile on his face.  He was excited.  I however, was still in disbelief.  Only because I never thought in my life I'd become pregnant.  Not that I had any physical issues whatsoever, I just didn't see it happening for me.  I never pictured marriage, babies, house of my own, ect.  But here I sit, 5 weeks later, 11 weeks pregnant. Scared out of my mind because I have my first doctor's appointment this Friday and although this wasn't the right time, I'm terrified she is going to tell me something horrible.  So I am praying that everything is well and I can continue to write in this blog for 7 more months.